West Indies withdraws its membership from ICC; will soon be an IPL team

The pendulum of fortune keeps fluctuating. However, for no other side this pendulum has swung so drastically as it has for West Indies. Once the kings of the game of cricket now find themselves as paupers. West Indies Cricket Board (WICB) has been in an epicentre of controversies in the recent times. And in yet another disappointing news, the Caribbean side have officially failed to gain a spot in the 2017 Champions Trophy. Bangladesh and Pakistan have edged past them for the 7th and 8th spots respectively.

With no finances left in their banks, the WICB in a bold step have decided to withdraw its ICC membership. In an unprecedented move, West Indies have decided to put their entire team on auction for the upcoming IPL.

A top WICB official, who didn’t wished to be named, got emotional and told the writer, “Maan, no finance to pay salaries. Besides, boys not care of Tests. Chris Gayle complains that his swimming pool misses him when he plays for five days plus if he plays long innings then he can’t tweet! Dwayne Bravo says that ‘I not fit’ and withdraws from national team but flies to India and takes flying catches. We big men of board decide that we put our team on auction in the IPL and earn some money. This will give fans back home some cheers. Chennai Super Kings and Rajasthan Royals not play for two years so instead. So West Indies play what they love and earn big money!”

When made to understand that it’s ‘Indian Premier League’. Gulping down his rum, the official shot back, “So what maan! We INDIANS too. WEST INDIANS!”

When the writer informed BCCI, an official (again not wished to be named) said, “We are delighted to have West Indies for IPL, it will be a great boost to our already prosperous economy. Our public just loves to see those guys play and dance on the field! Also WICB don’t need to pay us anymore for their side withdrawing from the tournament last year.”

Even the ruling party of India have welcomed the decision. A member of the Anurag Thakur camp was heard screaming in joy. “Digital India is all about connecting people all around. Look how far have we got our side connected. This is what our PM must have envisioned,” the member cried.

Meanwhile, as this news reaches Lahore, protests have already started between Pakistani players and Pakistan Cricket Board (PCB), the players demanding PCB following the footsteps of WICB with the lead rebel, Shahid Afridi saying, “We want to play IPL too. I want to take revenge for all the abuses the Indians hurl at my mother. And Inshallah the boys need money as well.”

So money crunched they are that it’s believed that Pakistani opener Ahmed Shehzad hasn’t clicked a selfie for 10 days to protest his inability to purchase iPhone 6S.

While BCCI haven’t commented to any of Afridi’s comments, MNS and Shiv Sena have already begun to gather the swords and sharpening the knives.

Please note this is a humour article — work of pure fiction

[Devashish Palkar, an MBBS student, A sports afficionado, news addict and a patient of OCSD ( Obsessive Compulsive Satirical Disorder)].
criclife.com

They might as well do that because the players will surely be more motivated and committed to play in the ipl where they can get the big money and the hype lifestyle that comes with it.