Richie Benaud must rescue us from the horror of KFC cricket

There are a couple of ways you can take Channel Nine CEO David Gyngell’s statement that a convalescing Richie Benaud might call this coming summer’s international cricket from his Coogee lounge room; either it’s the ultimate tribute to Benaud’s unimpeachable standing in the game and at his network, or it’s an admission from Nine that his stand-ins were so woefully short on gravitas last summer that they need a kind of remote-access babysitter.

From column A, the thought of Richie coming to us live from the lounge room conjures some evocative and very specific hypotheticals; will he be fully suited up on the settee or resplendent in suit-like beige pajamas and monogrammed slippers? Will Daphne make any guest appearances from the kitchen? Will he be forced to crunch away on a Zinger Burger to fulfill Channel Nine’s hourly quota of KFC mentions or will they take cross-promotion to new extremes and just beam him in from a sofa in one of The Block houses?